One Year

You hear the saying "What a difference a year makes?!"

Well, it is SO true!

Last night, Jeremy and I were daydreaming about meeting our babes. We get super excited when we think about what they will look like, what they will want to do in life, what activities they will participate in, and how much they will love each other and us. In our daydreams, we also realized where we were nearly exactly a year ago.

We lost our IVF chance on June 22, 2012...here is the heartbreaking blog post: Click here. Then on this very day (June 27) I wrote about suffering with OHSS: Click here. What's crazy is that I spent most of June taking it easy and staying on couch rest...fast forward to June 2013 and I have spent most of it on bed rest.

The only difference is that now we are awaiting our precious miracles arrival. What a difference a year makes?!

It really starts to put God's plan for us in perspective. Last year at this time, I was so disappointed. I thought that God had His plan for us all wrong. I couldn't believe that we weren't meant to be parents. I felt guilty for not allowing Jeremy be a dad. I was in a place of defeat.

But God didn't forget us. He had a plan for us all along. And now God has blessed us beyond our wildest dreams with a precious little boy and beautiful little girl. Now...if only He could speed up this process so we can finally meet them in person!!

Update: At my doctor's appointment yesterday, I found out I am progressing. But still no labor! I am nearly 4cm, 90% effaced, and at a -2 station. Many women are in labor at this point...but not me! My doctor said it could be days or...WEEKS! I am so excited to meet them I can hardly stand it. The latest that I will have to wait is around July 17 when I will be induced. I am hoping they decide to come on their own before that though. There are so many people that love these babies already and they are also so anxious to meet them.

Good things come to those who wait! We waited four years for these babies...I think we can wait a few more weeks if we have to!

-Lisa-

Waiting...waiting...waiting...

I knew I was an impatient person. Fertility treatments and all the WAITING drove me crazy.

Now, I am excited. And the anticipation of Max and Harper's arrival is wearing on me. I want to know when they are going to arrive and HOW.

Will they be June or July babies? Will they be healthy enough to come home with me instead of staying in NICU? Will I have a smooth labor? Or will I need a C-section?

All things I wish I knew the answers to. But just as God has taken care of us and blessed us. He will continue to follow the plan He has in place for us. The babies will come right when they are supposed to and God will watch over them.

I just wish I could see their beautiful faces now. I wish I could hold them, cuddle them, smell them (don't judge babies smell good), and kiss their cheeks.

I am so ready and excited to be a Mommy. I know I have less than 3 weeks as a maximum but I really want them to come sooner than later...just the selfish side of me!

I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow and looking forward to hearing if my cervix is progressing or not.

-Lisa-

Is This for Real?

I recently went back and read my blog posts from last March and April. I was heartbroken and confused. I didn't understand why Jeremy and I were going through infertility. However, by my blog posts, you really couldn't tell. I sound so positive and faithful. I don't think I was that way through most of our struggle. It was interesting to see what a difference a year makes. So for those that are still deep in the infertility struggle, keep up the hope. I know we hear that a lot as infertiles and I wouldn't have believed it if we weren't in the position we are now.

I am on spring break this week and have spent it working on the nursery. I knew there would be no other spare time for me to work on it through the end of the school year so I have kept busy. We painted the walls a light gray. We built a new closet system after we tore the other one out. I steam cleaned the carpets. Tuesday, Nebraska Furniture Mart delivered the furniture. And now it is real. Or is it? I feel like I should pinch myself. I leave the door open so every time I walk by the room, I can smile. I find myself in there just looking at the bedding, sitting in the rocker, and visualizing how wonderful our lives are going to be with Max and Harper.

I still have to decorate with wall decor and shelving but here are some current pictures of the state of the nursery.

On top of the pure elation and excitement, I also am a nervous wreck. Oh, the dreams that I have! Also, since when did TV shows not only have expectant twin mommies...but mommies that lose their twins?! Seriously, it makes me crazy! I freak out when I can't feel them. Although, talking to the doctor today, that is perfectly normal right now. I can't wait until Jeremy is able to feel the movement either. He is going to freak! Here are some ultrasound pics from today:

Maxwell's profile (He is so cute!)



Maxwell's back squishing Harper's profile

They are getting so big!

Happy Spring (kind of)! In KC, we have had cold and snow the last week. It really hasn't felt too much like spring. However, today it was in the 50's so I got my dogger, Bella, out for a 3 mile walk. Boy, am I tired! It felt great to be outside exercising a bit though.

-Lisa-

Gender Scan

First, a 17.5 week belly photo.

We had our gender scan with the perinatalogist this morning. I was so excited that I could hardly contain myself. I drank orange juice and ate a doughnut thinking that the sugar would get the babies really moving so we could get a sneak peak at their "goods".

It worked!!
Both babies were ready to display everything. In fact, Baby A was flipping and doing somersaults which made measuring a little difficult.

Baby A is my rambunctious little BOY!!! Here is a close up of his "special parts".

Baby B is my gorgeous little GIRL!!! Here are her goods on display for hopefully only this once (ha!).

So we have a perfect pairing of one of each. Jeremy is thrilled to have that little boy to play catch with and the little girl to be Daddy's girl. I am so excited to have a Mama's boy and to dress up my little girl. So...I couldn't help it. I went out and bought their first outfits. It was a difficult choice but I figure I will need to go shopping a lot more now.

We are both over the moon with excitement! On top of finding out genders, we found out that both babies are doing perfectly! They are measuring right on track and in fact Baby B is now measuring a day ahead of A and that is opposite of how it has been.

The pain on my left pelvic bone that I have had was supposed to be caused by Baby B. We found out that I have a uterine fibroid tumor. It isn't anything to be too concerned about for now but it can cause extra pain. At least I know that the severe pain wasn't in my head!

Here are some creepy face pictures of my darlings too.

 Still searching for a new blog title name and will hopefully think of one soon.

-Lisa-