Resolution Destroyed

My resolution for 2017 was to write on this blog twice a month. I was doing good...for like 3 whole weeks. I haven't been back here since January 21. What happened?!

LIFE. I have been running on all cylinders since then. Jeremy has been traveling a lot. I have even been out of town once in that time. Teaching in both locations is in the "busy season" of grading, projects, etc. The time I have free from work, I find myself cleaning, cooking and playing. I don't get a free moment where there is NOTHING to do...like blog. Hence, my resolution is destroyed.

But I am here. Still. I am still going to try. Hang with me as I find some kind of balance.

(My brain is so cluttered that I just took 45 minutes off in the middle of writing this to grade some college students' projects. I. Can't. Stop.)

Before this post gets off the rails...here's some toddler spam. My beautiful nearly 4-year-olds! Gah!

We went to the Globetrotters! So fun!

My mom went too!

Daddy-Daughter Dance

We got this dress especially for her date. You will see that this is now the only dress she wants to wear. Ever.

While Daddy and Harper had their date. I had my date with this guy. T-Rex Café.

My buddy!

Happy Valentine's Day!

Valentine's Ice Cream Date!

We have had crazy, wacky weather this winter.

February and 70's at the park with ice cream

Yum!

We found this cute little donut shop where the kids could create their own donut masterpiece and watch it get made.

Church pic. And that dress again.

Dress for success day at their school. The dress...again.

Jeremy has been in 2 different states in just this week. So I was a bad mom and we did Chick-fil-a one night earlier and then they got to experience their first happy meals too. We have always been too cheap...even for McDonald's...to get them their own happy meals. They will now be expecting them now! Also, they call this place "Old McDonalds" which is just the cutest.

I posted this video to my Instagram. Max got this Marshall toy from my niece for Christmas. It does so many different things that it's crazy. We never had cool toys like this. One of the commands has Marshall dancing. These two just joined right in and followed his commands. Ha!

Till next time! Hopefully soon!
-Lisa-

Dealing with Stress

Everyone has to deal with an amount of stress at one point or another...(or all points in varying levels). Some people deal by crying (sometimes me), throwing fits (sometimes me), or lashing out at loved ones (sometimes me). I am guilty of all of these ineffective stress relieving tactics.

However, I, for the majority, deal with stress internally. On the outside, I smile, nod and pretend that life is my oyster. Internally, I am freaking the F out! I have a hard time saying "No" when asked. I have the tendency to bite off more than I can chew. And I definitely invent the majority of the stress in my life.

This week has been A WEEK. Whew! I first of all promised to you, the blog world, that I would write to you more often. Much to my chagrin, my weekly Friday night alarm alerted me to WRITE. So, I am now hoping this self-inflicted stress turns into therapy. Bear with me...ya'll are my free therapy.


I begin my adjunct courses on Monday. Like three days from now. They are all online through the learning interface, Blackboard. For some flipping reason, I have not been granted access to set up said courses until today. TODAY! I have spent hours on the phone with Human Resources, my department, the university's technology center...no one can figure out what the hell was going on. It was so freaking frustrating!


Now, I get to spend my ENTIRE weekend (except for right now) building two courses I have never taught before. Luckily, I can build as we progress but the majority of the course needs to be done before I can release the site to the students. Oy!


Let's add in the fact that we started back to regular school (at the middle school) this week. And let me tell you...it hasn't been a pleasant start. I didn't realize how much I did NOT miss them until today. Again, oy!


[Insert loud, obnoxious sigh that I would roll my eyes at if it came from my husband.]


Now, let me paint back on my smile, perfect the nod and go back to pretending that life is grand. Deep down I know that my life is pretty flipping fantastic. But the stress I put on myself is making it difficult.

-Lisa-

Parents + 3 year olds= Insanity

Three-year-olds are just...awful. I mean this in the best and most honest way. I love them to pieces but year 3 is hard. Three-year-olds have attitudes and opinions. They have tempers and out of control emotions.

The problem is that I, a 33-year-old mother, have the same issues: attitude, opinions for days, a temper and out of control emotions. The mix of all of us together is a walking hormonal nightmare. The only true difference between my 3-year-olds and me is that 1) I can drive. 2) I can drink. 3) I don't throw myself onto the floor of the produce section of the grocery store.

However, there are windows in the day where three-year-olds are just the absolute best! Their genuine love of everything. It is always "the best ever" and they "love you soooo much". They tell the greatest stories. So great that I am never sure if the story is fiction or not. I hope fiction...they can get crazy! All of their songs come with hand motions...even the songs they make up in their head. They believe in magic, imaginary friends, peace, love, hope, and me. 

They really are spectacular little people. I didn't really mean that they are awful earlier...but parenting got real this year. We can legit screw up our kids now. I feel like before age three, they have no recollection on what the hell we've done or said to them. Now they will remember all of our mistakes and missteps. They will officially need therapy from their childhoods. It is quite the pressure. 

Raising one 3 year old is challenging. Raising two 3-year-olds is impossible! Ha! They couldn't be more different from one another either. They really are opposites. 

Max is the particular one...some may say OCD. He loves to cheat at board games. Hates to lose...whether that be a game or racing to his bedroom. He screams when he is upset. Like scream-screams. Not little toddler tantrums. Like he is summoning demons from deep inside...exorcist style. Like a Gremlin being fed after midnight. He has broken this mama's heart with phrases like "I don't love you" and "You are a mean mom" and "Get away from me". 

But he is also the most loving boy ever. He loves me hardcore. He snuggles and rocks with me every night. He dances to songs in his head and has some pretty good moves. He knows every word to every song on the radio. (This may not be a great parenting move by us.) He is SO smart. I don't mean because he is my kid. He really is a gifted child. We joke that he is our future engineer. He is a self-anointed "Puzzle Master" as he can put together large puzzles meant for someone twice his age. This is most likely the reason he is also in more trouble at school and home than his much calmer sister. 

Harper is our free spirit. She marches to the beat of her own drum. Her drum is filled with glitter, rainbows, unicorns, puppies, dolls and dresses. Seriously the girliest of girly girls. She hugs everyone she loves with such force that you know she means it. Her high-pitched voice warms your heart as she says "I love you so much, Mama!" She doesn't know how to run...this was made apparent at our brief 6-week stint as soccer players. She gallops or skips everywhere she goes. This just adds to the girlish charm of the princess. 

However, Harper is no angel (although she played one in a Christmas play). She is very calculating. She is seen by most everyone as the sweet one (mainly because everything listed above). However, she knows how to manipulate even the expert preschool teachers. She definitely has her Daddy in her back pocket. She also has a mean pincher...as in her hands. She pinches her brother quietly, but if you ever get a glimpse of her face as she does it...you may have nightmares. It's the three-year-old in her really. She can't help the devilish grin (at least that's what I tell myself to sleep at night).

Like the handmade camel and angel costumes?

Go Royals!

The best part of parenting! (and best part of me!)

PS...more rambling parenting posts to come!
-Lisa-

I. Am. Back.

Well, hello world!

If I had readers at one point...I am sure you have given up on me by now. After all, who wants to be a follower of a blog that randomly posts pictures of some cute kids once a year?! I have struggled with keeping this blog current really since the twins (now 3 1/2!) were one. It seems like life has been a blur. I always have these great hopes but they fall short in every way.

This is why my main goal for 2017 is to BLOG. Like every week? But realistically I would like to make at least 2 posts a month. I used to love writing. Now, I just veg out in front of Netflix when the kids go to bed. (As I am watching "The Crown" right now.) Writing is therapeutic. I think I need it back in my crazy life.

Of course, life is a lot crazier than it was when I was a regular blogger.

1. I have 2 jobs: 1 as a teacher (for 11 years now) and 1 as an adjunct professor. It just so happens I am teaching two new courses that I have never taught before so there's that added stress...

2. Jeremy has a million jobs too (maybe just 3...or 4? I lose count. He is always busy!)

3. Our kids are HUGE! They are getting involved with other activities and well, just big kids now.

4. What the hell do I write about?! I am a different person than I was when I started this blog 5 years ago.

However, I am reinvesting myself into this space. I may not write about interesting topics. I may not make much sense. But I am going to write. I have even set up a reminder every Friday evening to blog.

So, 2017...here I come!


-Lisa-

Catch Up with Christmas

A lot has happened between my last post in September until now...but I am going to ignore my absence and move on like old friends. (I know my friends and I can be away from each other for months or years but we always are able to pick right up where we left off like there was no time gap.) That's how I feel about the blog. I want to continue to blog. I do. I just feel like the last 8 months have been difficult: sadness over Dad's illness and death, busy job, busy toddlers, etc.

 I do regret not making this space a priority. I am not going to make any promises but I do want to try and write more. It may be very therapeutic. 

I have a million things to say. But let's start with Christmas!

Christmas was a great time as a kid. I remember the excitement and anticipation. I loved our traditions and I loved the idea of Santa. Heck, I think I finally found out the truth when I was 12 or 13. I just wanted that magic to last.

That's what is great about having kids over Christmas. Bringing that Christmas magic alive to them is amazing. Seeing Christmas through their eyes makes my heart melt and it brings back that childhood magic times 100!

We tried to take the kids to any holiday event that kids would enjoy. But I have to admit, we had just as much fun as they did.

We started a new tradition of the Elf on the Shelf.
This is Ellie Doodle. She made our lives amazing for a few weeks.
They slept in (you know because we had to wait until Ellie Doodle gets back)
She made them want to actually poop in the potty because she would be so proud of them and tell Santa.
What would we do without Ellie Doodle? 

They had so much fun decorating the tree this year.

Cheesin'

I love a good crying Santa picture. They are so cute!

My whole family (all of them!) went to the Country Club Plaza for dinner and a sleigh ride. It was so much fun and a lasting memory. We need to start making new memories and traditions because Christmas is so different without our Dad.

Photo bombed on the Plaza

Weather has been so odd here. Weeks leading up to Christmas were so warm for the season. A week before Christmas, Jeremy and I were removing leaves from the yard. Crazy weather!

We made cookies to give to friends. And made cards for their teachers at school. They had so much fun!

There is a Magic Tree. It is gorgeous. 

Magical, right?

We went through the drive through park with Christmas Lights. The kids got into jammies and got to sit in the front seat.

We had to wait in a long slow-moving line for 45 minutes and they did fantastic.

We visited our train station downtown to go through Santa's train. We stayed to look at a couple giant trees too.

We then decided to make our own train. Icing was the real attraction here. 

I feel like all of these events, outings and fun were good for them. But they also took my mind off of the idea of spending Christmas without my dad. They distracted me from the deep sadness and anxiety I had. I am not sure what I would do without them. I think our whole family would have been pretty depressed without these two. They brought laughter and smiles during the holiday season. The way Dad would want. We had a noticeable hole where Dad should be. His chair, his laugh, his smile, his prayer, etc. We missed him but we also enjoyed family time. Together. The only way Dad would have it.

Christmas with Jeremy's family

Missing a couple nieces and their husbands but this is most of the crew

We love our Nonnie

Christmas morning

"Mama, Santa came!"

My fam

All 4 of us

Their smiles are really funny lately. 

A few days after Christmas, the weather changed and we finally got SNOW! I am not a huge fan of snow. These two LOVE it. I had to force them to come inside. Nonnie got them snowsuits last year and we only got to to use them once. They still fit this year and she got them these sleds. They had a blast. 

Part of the Max and Harper's present from Mommy and Daddy was their big kid beds. My sister, brother-in-law, niece and nephew watched them for their first ever overnight. I was sad, but it was time. I was mainly worried I wouldn't be there when they needed me. Come to find out...they are just fine without me. Sad. But it was great to have a date night with Jeremy. We also put together their toddler beds while they were gone. That way they could come in and see them. They have been sleeping amazingly! I wish we had done it sooner. They are sleeping rock stars.

Max loves firetrucks. And Paw Patrol. We blew his mind with this one.

First night in his big kid bed.

Princess Harper's bed (this is how she refers to it)

She got a little crazy the first night. I had to move her. The 2nd night I found her on the floor at 2am. She is staying in her bed better now. 

So Christmas was pretty great. I hope to make other posts in the next couple days. I go back to work on Monday and need to make sure I am getting caught up. I hope you all had a fantastic holidays. I am now going to spend my afternoon getting caught up on reading your blogs. I haven't read in a month so I am sure I missed quite a bit.

-Lisa-