All About Mama

I have fond memories of my 5 week postpartum post. It was this post that I was only 20 pounds from pre-pregnancy weight. Ahhh...the memories!

Have you noticed there have been no more "anti-belly" posts since then? That was on purpose. Let me fill you in on "Mama" (Harper says that now by the way!).

I was cleared for exercise at my 6 week postpartum appointment. So, I started jogging/walking in the evenings when Jeremy would get home from work. I would do a 1-2 mile run on the weekends. I was trying to ease my way back into running after a 9 month break from it. It was going really well.

I was exercising and watching my portions. Man, I was going to be back to my size 6 jeans comfortably by Christmas! Ha! I went back to the doctor to get my Mirena placed. At the weigh-in...I had gained weight! What?! How was this possible? I was doing everything right.

October rolled around and I was back to work. Granted my workouts were shortened and eventually non-existent. I was exhausted. I attributed the fatigue to being a twin mommy with a full time job.

I started noticing that my pants I was able to wear in August, I couldn't fit in anymore. Thanksgiving break required a trip to get new work clothes to get me through until I could get more of this darn weight off.

In December, I was on the couch wrapping Christmas presents when Jeremy noticed that my neck was enlarged. If he notices something...it must be true! (I could cut off my hair and dye it purple and he may not notice!) I immediately felt my neck and knew my thyroid was much bigger than normal. It felt like a golf ball.

Why did I know it was my thyroid? You see, I have seen a thyroid doctor since I was 22. My OB at the time noticed I had an enlarged neck. I was sent to see the ENT. It was discovered that I have a goiter from Hashimoto's Syndrome. I have had biopsies done and no cancer. I have had bloodwork done and no hormone issues. I have known about these issues for years. I had to have my levels monitored during pregnancy and again, no issues.

When I felt the giant golf ball in my neck, I called my ENT to get an appointment. Luckily, he could see me the morning of Christmas Eve. I got new bloodwork drawn. I always have normal levels but not so lucky this time!

My doctor said that I clearly have hypothyroidism. This means my thyroid is under active. It isn't producing enough hormones to regulate my metabolism. Apparently, even the most normal functioning thyroid can be thrown into a tailspin after a pregnancy. So no surprise that my already jacked up thyroid is struggling.

Here are some of the many symptoms of hypothyroidism. I pretty much have them all! I now have answers to these questions:

Why have I gained 45 pounds in 4 months? (Seriously, that's what I have gained!)

Why am I tired all the time? (The babies sleep for 10-11 hours so no blaming them.)

Why am I still losing hair by the handful? (Pregnancy hormones are done with.)

Why is my skin unable to be lotioned enough? (I go through gallons of Jergens.)

Why am I always so freaking cold? (I seriously could set our thermostat on 73 and still not be warm enough!)

I have felt so awful since really October. I haven't felt like myself. I am depressed that I am now a size 10!!! I am down on myself for not having the energy to do anything outside of being a walking zombie. I feel sad that I can't be the mother I want to be. 

Where do I go from here? Well, I see a specialist next Friday (Happy Valentine's Day to me!). I am hoping that I will have more answers after that visit. I am expecting to be on medications and well monitored. I am also assuming that I will eventually have my thyroid removed, like my mother. I will take thyroid medicine the rest of my life if it means that I have a chance of feeling normal. 

I haven't even felt well enough or confident enough to try and work out. I am hoping with the medicine that I will have the energy to get my body and mind back. 

So, Mama is hopefully going to get her groove back soon. Then, I can start posting anti-belly posts again!

The twins' 7 month update coming next week, too! Lots of changes and accomplishments! Here is a sneak peek at Max & Harper!

-Lisa-