Well it was Fun While it Lasted!

I don't have any witty comments for today's blog. The reality is that our IVF journey is over really before it ever had a chance to start. We have been suffering with this impending doom since Saturday morning but became very much real to us today.

I have not been responding to the injections like expected. My follicles should be measuring around 18mm at this point and I am stuck at 13mm. My estrogen levels are also fairly low for where I should be.

Without enough progress, the doctor told us that he would continue if we wanted to but that it was risky and an expensive risk at that. He suggested changing to an insemination cycle instead. This is about $8500 cheaper. This way if this IUI (intra-uterine insemination) doesn't work, we can still try IVF again. If we do IVF again, they will be able to use a different protocol that would hopefully give me time to respond appropriately. Dr. Kim is clearly just as shocked as we are because I have never shown signs of low response.

Sometimes the scariest place to be is in my hormonal head. Luckily, I have the best husband/partner/friend EVER! When this is clearly my "fault," Jeremy won't ever let me think or feel that way. In fact, he will be upset that I even said "MY FAULT" out loud or in this blog post. I love him for that. Without his support, I would be a wreck. Some husbands wouldn't stand by their wives after so many failed attempts. It isn't even an issue for him. He loves me. He is there for me no matter what. Boy, God has truly blessed me with him.

So our journey to a family continues but just in a different way. The 30+ shots and $5000 worth of meds that have already been pumped into me will not be in vain. I just pray that this IUI is the answer to our prayers and that this is what God has planned for us. We will be all right however this journey turns out. It has truly opened my eyes to how strong I could be. I never thought that I could go through what I have and still be somewhat sane. (Jeremy may debate the whole sane part!)

I kept singing this song in my head since I heard the bad news on Saturday morning. It pretty much wraps up God's Will for me. The best line in the song is "I won't give you more, more than you can take. And I might let you bend but I won't let you break." It is worth a listen.

Keep up the prayers for us! We really appreciate all of the prayers and support from our family and friends...we are beyond blessed by all of you!

-Lisa-